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We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.

THE PRICE OF CHANGE

by mzii

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1.
in the springtime sick of staying inside it felt like the code and the numbers were eating me alive gagging for the weekend though every day I was sleeping in I plastered my walls with diagrams of my mind then we'd take the bus to an open space where skies were blue and we'd lie in the grass playing blockus and drinking hooch drinking hooch (I'll fuck my friends, fuck higher education get depressed about miscommunications everything was bad and everything hurt I wished I could decompose into the dirt with the woodlice and worms I would pick up off the pavement crying + begging myself to stay patient in just a few weeks term would be over until then, get used to being mediocre) feeling uninspired by my binge-drinking, chain-smoking nights nobody could save me, nobody could set me right but Frank'd come to my room told me I could leave I'd I wanted to and I cried with Laura in the spoons after missing my tattoo bless the youth
2.
I would drink mango shakes on the beach as the sun kissed the sea sand under my nails and in the gusset of my swimming costume I can finally romanticise the sunscreen, rash vests the poolside french fries skin, a sticky saline reading John Green books and fictional crime and the nights of warm air blowin' across the ocean tustlin' my hair the smoke from citronella coils curling upwards past the corn wrapped in tin foil the stars in some kind of competition with the fire dancers I was always scared of missing cards played by candlelight left in a pile for the tom yum and pineapple fried rice
3.
I was getting ear infections every other month in between the swimming training and the skipping lunch had to use my time wisely, head down to the band room didn't know shit about guitars but I could hit the drums to any tune yeahhh let's make out in the practice room yeahhh I love the way your fingers move electric in your hand, plug the amp, turn it up to seventeen, peach iced tea I am just your drummer and you love me for it babey you didn't mean to fuck with me I am just your drummer wanting more than you can give me I was just a humble trash man looking for a fix doing homework on the bus into school, thinkin' bout your lips how the fuck should I know what to do about you? you were the trickiest compsci problem I ever knew yeahhh let's make out on the rooftop yeahhh getting hammered 'til the dropoff took your fuckin hand, didn't plan it but the moment took me by surprise, I wanted your thighs what could go wrong? we just had prom and then the goodbyes I didn't try to make you mine for years I told myself that I had really fucked it this time

about

the concept of this collection is memories/situations/times in my life that feel very strongly linked to specific beverages

all the money u give me for this music goes straight to bailproject.org (apart from the money bandcamp takes as a fee) - if u wanna send me a receipt of a direct donation to an activist bail fund instead, I'll send u the tracks :)

credits

released July 19, 2020

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about

mzii England, UK

fresh organic beats from ur local music nerd

@smooshyberry on insta

msg me Rio! I gave u the wrong email

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